Pink aardvarks

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This is a vintage AVENwiki page, and has been protected against any further editing and archived for future reference uses. It has been retained for its historical relevance.

This article explains an inside joke used on the AVEN forums, especially the Just For Fun board.
It does not describe any actual facts, nor does it represent the beliefs of asexuals as a whole.

Pink Aardvarks are the primary indigenous inhabitants of the moon, where they have existed peacefully for many centuries, apart from the occasional union strike and conflict with Somalia. The staple of the pink lunar aardvarks' diet is the moon itself, which they consume and regurgitate in alternating cycles.

They were the subject of a reality TV series called 'The Clangers' which was translated ito a dozen space languages by the power of the slide whistle. The series also featured the last surviving soup dragon who had been brought to the moon by giant straws centuries before to feed the straw workforce. It took two hundred years before the Pink Aavarks overthrew their straw overlords through the use of tinfoil.

Contrary to popular belief, pink aardvarks do not like to be juggled. They prefer to be swung jubilantly in macramé knapsacks.

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