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WTFromantic is a term to describe a person who disidentifies with the concept of romantic orientation. WTFromantic (as in "what-the-fuck-romantic") first originated as an expression of personal frustration with the concept of romance. Later, "quoiromantic" (pronounced kwa-romantic) was proposed as an alternative, replacing the "WTF" with "quoi," the French word for "what." Reasons for identifying with WTF/quoiromanticism may include feeling neither romantic nor aromantic, finding the concept of romantic attraction to be confusing, finding the romantic/nonromantic distinction to be inaccessible in some way, or not seeing the lines between romance and friendship.

WTFromantics and quoiromantics may or may not identify as grey-romantic or with the aromantic spectrum.

Quoiromantic experiences may include:

  • Being unsure if you experience romantic attraction or not
  • Being unable to understand attraction as a concept or feeling
  • Finding the concept of attraction to be inaccessible, inapplicable, or nonsensical
  • Being unable to pin down a clear understanding of romantic attraction, so being unable to say whether or not you experience it
  • Having a difficulty distinguishing romantic attraction from other types of attraction, or being unable to distinguish them at all
  • Questioning romanticism for such a long time that the questioning itself becomes the identity, rather than a path toward any other more stable identity
  • Struggling with romanticism because it feels too complicated
  • Simply not feeling that any other romantic orientation label is applicable


As a consequence of the romantic orientation model becoming popular in the asexual community in the 2000s, some asexual people began to openly discuss why the model did not feel right for them.[​​ For example, Kaz wrote that for zer, asking "so what's your romantic orientation?" is "the wrong question."​​ In 2011, in order to express frustration with the system, Sciatrix began half-jokingly referring to herself as "wtfromantic" (as in "what-the-fuck-romantic").​​ In her words, "it started as a flippant, honestly fairly sarcastic frustrated comment, not an attempt as a serious identity designation," one she did not expect to resonate with other people and begin to proliferate.​​ As a more pronounceable alternative, quoiromantic was proposed by Cor in 2012.​​ Both terms are still in use today. The premise of the quoiromantic identity has also spread to other areas, resulting terms such as quoisexual, quoigender, and quoigenic.

It is unknown how many people identify with quoiromanticism outside the asexual community, but the results of the 2016 asexual community census showed that 9.5% of respondents identify as quoiromantic or wtfromantic.

External links

Romantic orientation
Aromantic · Biromantic · Demiromantic · Gray-romantic · Heteroromantic · Homoromantic · Lithromantic · Panromantic · WTFromantic