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− | It's hard to imagine what it must be like. In a completely sexcentric society. From the Songs of Solomon and before, to sitcoms and sci fi. How is it possible for an Asexual person to find peace with him -or herself, and have some sense of wholeness, when all traditional wisdoms of normality is Sex Is Good And Normal? I can't help but think that is a bigger obstacle than for me figuring out my options. At least the culture I grew up in has a million and more little roadmaps to my needs.
| + | If you just cuddle, that's ok, and she loves you. If you end up having sex, that's ok, and she loves you. If you get all self-conscious, totally lose the mood, and have an "Oh damn, I totally didn't relax" freakout, that's ok and she loves you. In fact, if that happens, I suggest you both make a point of laughing at the ridiculousness of it all - maybe pre-agree that if you freak out, then that means she has to feed you ice-cream until you calm down again, or some circuit-breaker like that. |
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− | – Nuit, [http://www.asexuality.org/en/index.php?/topic/66600-what-is-love/page__p__1980474#entry1980474 an ally.] | + | – Olivier, [http://www.asexuality.org/en/index.php?/topic/67164-insecurities-in-the-way/page__p__1990557#entry1990557 on putting asexual partners at ease in mixed relationships]. |
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AVEN Post of the Week
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If you just cuddle, that's ok, and she loves you. If you end up having sex, that's ok, and she loves you. If you get all self-conscious, totally lose the mood, and have an "Oh damn, I totally didn't relax" freakout, that's ok and she loves you. In fact, if that happens, I suggest you both make a point of laughing at the ridiculousness of it all - maybe pre-agree that if you freak out, then that means she has to feed you ice-cream until you calm down again, or some circuit-breaker like that.
– Olivier, on putting asexual partners at ease in mixed relationships.
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Did you know...
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• … that some asexual people are happier on their own or with a group of close friends, while other asexuals have a desire to date and will form more intimate romantic relationships?
• … that asexual relationships are based on the same elements that are also important for many sexual people, like understanding, commitment, trust, emotional intimacy and communication?
• … that for some asexuals arousal is a fairly regular occurrence, though it is not associated with a desire to find a sexual partner? Some asexuals will occasionally masturbate, but feel no desire for partnered sexuality. Other asexual people experience little or no arousal.
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Asexuality in Media and Research
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